somemother

part forum. part confession. part celebration.

54. Once a Mother, Always a Mother ((Happy Mother’s Day!)) May 13, 2012

ESTABLISHING YOURSELF (a few details that help somemothers know what they have in common with you).

 

I am 68 years old.

 

I am divorced.

 

I have 4 children. Here are their ages/genders: 4 girls: 46, 41, 37, 37.  PMS was fun at my house.

 

I am retired.

 

I am lower.

 

I live urban.

 

I rent.

 

I completed Grade 11. To cool for school.

 

I am straight.

 

Of note about my ethnicity and/or cultural background: Christian.

 

NOW, TWENTY QUESTIONS ABOUT YOU

  1. The most significant aspect of my upbringing. My parents were always around. My mom was a stay-at-home-mom. Most important we had a christian home.
  2. My best advice to mothers about to enter the stage of child rearing that I just went through. It has been a long time since I had children at home that I was responsible for. I did some things right and a lot wrong – but – not one died, got pregnant, or in trouble with the law (that I know of). Some of the things I learnt: Don’t sweat the small  stuff. Don’t expect perfection. Learn as you go. Work together with your mate – you are both learning how to do this job (without training). Don’t criticize your mate in front of your children. Show respect for each other and your children will learn respect. That is a lot of don’ts. Most of all love your children, be patient. Remember you are capable of so much more than you think you are!  Taking on responsibilities doesn’t mean giving up joy. Sometimes it is a great way to find it.
  3. Something that concerns me about my children. As mothers themselves they need to count their blessings and be HAPPY and CONTENT with where they are at, at that moment. Cut themselves and others some slack. And ENJOY!
  4. My absolute worst mothering moment (so far). There are so many I couldn’t even list them. As for my children they tell me they don’t remember me yelling at them ever!!! So…
  5. What annoys me most about other mothers. When they compare their kids to other kids, expect them to do “as good” or better in everything. All kids are different(even in the same family). God made them that way. For a reason I might add!
  6. I am happiest when my family is happy, at peace with each other, and enjoying life together.
  7. I am saddest when my children are in discord. They say it doesn’t concern me – but that is not true. It is always my concern. If it hurts your child, it hurts you more. Doesn’t matter how old they are.  Once a Mother always a Mother!
  8. My biggest fear. Something will happen to one of my children or grandkids.
  9. I am ashamed of. After working almost all my life, I will most likely need financial help from my kids in the near future.
  10. Something I need to forgive. Disrespect.
  11. Something I wish I could say to someone.  Let yourself be happy and content. Life goes by too quickly to be otherwise. Tell the ones you love–that you do love them often, for no reason, and show it by your actions.
  12. Something I have never told anyone. I am afraid a lot of the time that I am not a good enough person, that I don’t deserve to be happy — Then I shake my head and remember –I am God’s child.
  13. Something I am trying to change about myself. To be more confident, not to be afraid, to believe in myself. Above all to LET GOD!
  14. My biggest accomplishment. My kids! Second: surviving my divorce.
  15. I wish I could be the mother my children envision…  I am not , so they will have to accept what God gave them.
  16. Something my relationship with my mother has taught me about parenting. My Mother made our house a HOME! No matter how much we had or didn’t have. We always felt safe and loved.
  17. Something my relationship with my father has taught me about parenting. My Father was a patient, kind man. He had a great sense of humour. He loved all his children unconditionally. I strive to be like him!
  18. How I would describe my faith life. I know that God has my life in his hands. I do admit that I have to remind myself of that fact many times.  There are a lot of things to think about, but nothing to worry about!
  19. Something I hope will be different for me by this time next year. My family will ALL be together happy and content!
  20. Something important about my story that hasn’t been captured by the questions above.  Motherhood is the greatest, unending, most rewarding job you will ever have. You need to know it will never end. Your heart and mind will always be with each one of your children for the rest of your life. SO ENJOY!  Once a Mother, always a Mother.  God Bless.
  21. BONUS: A question you would like to see added to this list that readers can respond to in the comments.
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51. Anger is a Genetic Disease March 18, 2012

Filed under: Story — somemother @ 10:32 pm
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ESTABLISHING YOURSELF (a few details that help somemothers know what they have in common with you).

 

I am 32 years old.

I am married.

I have 2 children. Here are their ages/genders: 34 months-girl and 6 months-girl.

stay home.

I have caviar taste on a Wal-Mart budget.

I live suburban.

just bought our first home.

I completed high school then took 10 years to “find myself” and complete a college degree that put me so far into debt that I’ll never be able to repay in my lifetime and am now armed with skills in an industry that is not needed in a depression… excuse me “recession”.

I am straight.

Of note about my ethnicity and/or cultural background: I’m as mutty as they come, but consider my cultural background to be “West Coast”.

 

NOW, TWENTY QUESTIONS ABOUT YOU

  1. The most significant aspect of my upbringing.

I’m the eldest and only girl with 4 younger half brothers.  Spent my time moving back and forth 3,000 miles between parents.  It’s not my fault I’ve lived in the most beautiful places in America, so I try very hard every day to lower my expectations of… everything and everyone. 

  1. My best advice to mothers about to enter the stage of child rearing that I just went through.

Do not take for granted your babies.  Sure, they can’t wipe their ass, but they are the fuel for your soul.

  1. Something that concerns me about my child(ren).

I worry intensely about raising girls as I have not conquered my demons as of yet.  I feel like I should have done that before I had children, but I’m not even sure I know how.  I worry about passing on my food issues, my anxiety, and my people pleasing, my persistent negative self-talk. 

  1. My absolute worst mothering moment (so far).

I am still mortified at how I yelled at my daughter and spanked her one time when she would quit getting out of bed at night.  I didn’t seem to have a lick of common sense in my head that day.  It haunts me now and I hope she never remembers it. 

  1. What annoys me most about other mothers.

Moms who are constantly competitive—oh your child can do this?  Mine was doing that weeks ago!!!  Moms who don’t discipline their children in public (I don’t mean spanking, I mean consistent parenting no matter where you are). 

  1. I am happiest when.

My daughter comes up to me and tells me she loves me and snuggles me tightly.  There is no where else in the universe I’d rather be.

  1. I am saddest when.

I feel out of control, like a bad mom, bad wife, bad friend, etc., etc.,  I can get myself down pretty easily.

  1. My biggest fear.

My biggest fear is losing my family.  I am constantly thinking about “what if…” because I feel so lucky and I always worry that it can be taken away at any moment.

  1. I am ashamed of.

There is nothing I am ashamed of but myself.  My body probably.  It disgusts me.

  1. Something I need to forgive.

Hahahahaha.  One thing?  Well, my therapist and I have started by trying to forgive my parents.  Work in progress. 

  1. Something I wish I could say to someone.

Are you a moron or what?

  1. Something I have never told anyone.

I’m pretty open, pretty extroverted, and make friends easily so I’m not sure there is anything I haven’t told anyone. 

  1. Something I am trying to change about myself.

I am trying to change my lifestyle, my eating, my thoughts about my body.

  1. My biggest accomplishment.

I guess successfully raising a little human being this far has been my biggest accomplishment.  The icing on the cake:  she’s sweet, smart, kind, and hilarious.  I have to give that up to her, but I’ll take credit for nudging her along that path.

  1. I wish.

I wish I was perfect and never made bad decisions.

  1. Something my relationship with my mother has taught me about parenting.

Anger is a genetic disease.

  1. Something my relationship with my father has taught me about parenting.

Physical affection is more important than things.

  1. How I would describe my faith life.

Spirituality can be found, cultivated, and celebrated from within.

  1. Something I hope will be different for me by this time next year.

I’d like to be working for the first time in 3 years.

  1. Something important about my story that hasn’t been captured by the questions above.

You haven’t figured out that I’m extremely hard on myself and others yet?  Idiot…

  1. BONUS: A question you would like to see added to this list that readers can respond to in the comments.
 

38. Looking Like the Devil September 27, 2011

Filed under: Story — somemother @ 10:08 pm
Tags: , , , , , ,

 

ESTABLISHING YOURSELF (a few details that help somemothers know what they have in common with you).

I am  45 years old.

I am married.

I have 2 children. 6 and 9 Girls.

I  work part-time. 

I am middle middle. 

I live urban. 

I own.

I completed high school and a certificate in Graphic Design from New England School of Art & Design, Boston.

I am straight.

I am of Italian decent and American born.

 

NOW, TWENTY QUESTIONS ABOUT YOU

  1. The most significant aspect of my upbringing. I was not hand-held or babied too much, I had to work out most problems by myself.
  2. My best advice to mothers about to enter the stage of child rearing that I just went through. Lead by example! And be honest.
  3. Something that concerns me about my children. Bull-headed.
  4. My absolute worst mothering moment (so far). Losing it from time to time and looking like the devil when I do.
  5. What annoys me most about other mothers. The need to make everyone believe their children are superstars.
  6. I am happiest when I create and run free with my girls.
  7. I am saddest when I cannot solve a problem.
  8. My biggest fear. Death and illness.
  9. I am ashamed of not brushing my teeth every night.
  10. Something I need to forgive. My husband for not being more aggressive when it comes to making money.
  11. Something I wish I could say to someone. Mom, I have always loved you and wanted to be with you more.
  12. Something I have never told anyone. I tell my husband everything.
  13. Something I am trying to change about myself. I am trying to play bigger.
  14. My biggest accomplishment. Designing the Outdoor Advertising for Nike in Miami.
  15. I wish this time now could last forever.
  16. Something my relationship with my mother has taught me about parenting. Be happy, and love people.
  17. Something my relationship with my father has taught me about parenting. Be firm and let your children know “They can do it.”
  18. How I would describe my faith life. I believe big time.
  19. Something I hope will be different for me by this time next year. I will have established and grown my creative business. Oh and that I will be writing more.
  20. Something important about my story that hasn’t been captured by the questions above. I love to inspire people. I also love to push their buttons in order to take them out of their comfort zone.
  21. BONUS: A question you would like to see added to this list that readers can respond to in the comments.  Would you like to play in my sandbox?
 

30. The Constant Pursuit of Humanity August 23, 2011

Filed under: Story — somemother @ 10:14 pm
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ESTABLISHING YOURSELF (a few details that help somemothers know what they have in common with you).

I am 38 years old.

I am common-law.

I have 2 girls, a 5yr old,  and 3 month old.

I stay home with our children. Work for money occasionally & volunteer a lot, especially that which benefits community/environment my children grow in.

I am classless (in my mind anyway ;-))

I live urban.

I rent.

I completed a certificate in arbitration & mediation, some university psych major and have discovered that I really don’t want to deal with other people’s drama. My dream career, after kids, is to work in a library, book store, with literature or some such thing.

I am queer.

Of note about my ethnicity and/or cultural background: European; British, Irish, Scottish, French. I am related to the late Oscar Wilde! This excites me wondrously 🙂

 

NOW, TWENTY QUESTIONS ABOUT YOU

  1. The most significant aspect of my upbringing.   Several things: a) Living humbly; not being overindulged yet having a perfectly magical childhood. b) Compassion for those less fortunate.  c) I always appreciated being given choices. My parents, when I became old enough, often gave me all the information possible and allowed me to make, or help make, the best decision for me. I continue to feel that it is important to include the children in certain aspects of decisions affecting their lives. Learning through experience rather than being told usually sticks better. That being said, I also feel I was given way too much responsibility at times. I seek a balance for my own children.
  2. My best advice to mothers about to enter the stage of child-rearing that I just went through. In any stage, keep track of the good moments, write them down if you have to. The ups are worth more than the downs. You can never get that time back so enjoy every bit possible.
  3. Something that concerns me about my children. Their physical health, especially with regard to genetic immunological disorder. Also, any kind of harm coming to them because of their family situation; discrimination.
  4. My absolute worst mothering moment (so far). Forgetting that my child is just that, a child who is still learning and knows not what I have a lifetime of experience with. Yelling, losing control just that little bit that is too much for a tiny person (the 5 yr old, not the infant!) and makes her feel or act inadequate. I know every (or just about every) parent can relate. But it’s still yucky. Best mothering moment would be building my child up so that she feels on top of the world and I endeavor to, at least, keep these moments in the majority.
  5. What annoys me most about other mothers. Ignoring their children, taking them for granted, having a good time/laugh at the expense of the child. Parents who can’t/don’t take responsibility for their children, rather they  place importance on superficial things.
  6. I am happiest when I feel balanced. Getting time with each child & both children, while getting to do some things I enjoy.
  7. I am saddest when I can’t fix my child’s hurt. The big hurts.
  8. My biggest fear is harm coming to my children.
  9. I am ashamed of ever making my child feel unworthy in any way.
  10. Something I need to forgive is the lack of (intimate) attention I give to my spouse.
  11. Something I wish I could say to someone is don’t be so gullible.
  12. Something I have never told anyone is that I get really tired of being environmentally conscientious sometimes too. And have tossed out some valuable recyclables or left the car idling etc simply because I am too tired.
  13. Something I am trying to change about myself is to judge others less, even though I do not make it known that I am judging. “Never judge someone until you have walked a mile in their shoes.”.
  14. My biggest accomplishment is achieving inner balance and being satisfied with myself & passing this along to my family. Teaching by example.
  15. I wish we had just a little bit more money. I wish my partner got to stay home & see our children the way I get to everyday. I wish people would give their head a shake.  I wish adults would think before they speak in front of children. I wish I knew everything. I wish I didn’t have asthma. I wish I didn’t pass it along to my child(ren). I wish the world was perfect. I wish my children would never have to experience heart ache … alas, I suppose this would be to deny them part of the experience of life 😦
  16. Something my relationship with my mother has taught me about parenting. My mother, for most of my life, has been able to listen to me. Listening & compassion. Simply listening, without verbal opinions, is such a valuable trait.
  17. Something my relationship with my father has taught me about parenting. Creativity is very important to learning & living. Knowledge is power. Compassion.
  18. How I would describe my faith life. The constant pursuit of humanity.
  19. Something I hope will be different for me by this time next year. Tighter abs, seriously, I give myself a year.
  20. Something important about my story that hasn’t been captured by the questions above. Please don’t ask me about the conception of my children in front of them, as if they aren’t even there. Particularly the older one who can hear every (insensitive) word you utter. She is a real live person, with feelings and who is entitled to privacy. Save your curiosity for a more appropriate time.
  21. BONUS: A question you would like to see added to this list that readers can respond to in the comments. How has becoming a mother added to/taken away from your relationship with your partner/spouse? Becoming a mother, or in our case, becoming mothers has been like a glorious blooming flower. It has made each of us grow immensely, in ways I didn’t expect, delightful little ways. However, it is true what is said about the “strain on the marriage”, though I wouldn’t  “blame” it on the children per se, becoming a parent is all-consuming and often it is the spouses who makes sacrifices. Probably because spouses are the only ones who will make sacrifices for our children’s sake and still be with us at the end of it all. At times,  it kind of feels like the relationship can wait. Sometimes it does, sometimes it doesn’t I guess.
 

25. Striving August 8, 2011

Filed under: Story — somemother @ 11:18 pm
Tags: , , , , , , , ,

ESTABLISHING YOURSELF (a few details that help somemothers know what they have in common with you)

I am 31 years old.

I am happily married to a great husband who I have trained quite well.

I have 2 children. Here are their ages/genders: The baby girl is 1 and my big girl is six.  They are the reason I get up in the morning.

I work full-time.  I would give my left eyeball to be able to stay home with my babies.

I am middle.  We live modestly, but we always manage to have all our bills paid on time and indulge in the occasional splurge.

I live suburban.

I own.

I completed high school with four and a half years of college as an English major.  Thanks to my great dedication to partying and refusal to go to class, I managed to escape without a degree.

I am straight.  Although, my baby’s nanny is a lesbian and is so awesome I’ve been tempted to change my ways for her.  Best person EVER! 

Of note about my ethnicity and/or cultural background:  The only thing of note about my background is that it’s not notable.  European ancestry with some Native American thrown in there that only manifests itself in my cheekbones and nose.  As southern as they come, but free from all the southern stereotypes except the accent.

 

NOW, TWENTY QUESTIONS ABOUT YOU

  1. The most significant aspect of my upbringing.

I was brought up to be true to myself, to think for myself, and to not judge others.  Plus, my parents are ex-hippie nudists. 

  1. My best advice to mothers about to enter the stage of child rearing that I just went through.

Remember that for every phase your kids are in that is driving you crazy, it will be over before you even have a chance to adjust to it and figure out how to deal with it.  Then -they’ll enter a new phase that will drive you crazy.  Cherish every moment ‘cause before you know it, the moment’s over and you won’t get another chance to watch your kids grow up.  And they won’t get another chance to do it.

  1. Something that concerns me about my child(ren).

Nothing!  My children are perfect.  Kidding, but really, I have been blessed with extraordinarily healthy, happy children.  My only concern, as someone who has suffered from depression and other issues, is that they grow up to be happy, well-adjusted adults.  That’s harder to do than one might think.

  1. My absolute worst mothering moment (so far).

If only I could pick just one.  My worst mothering moments are when I lose my temper, which happens more than I would like.  I strive daily to be more pleasant, kinder and less overall grumpy and to not let my personal unhappiness bleed over into my children’s lives.

  1. What annoys me most about other mothers.

It annoys me when other mothers foster dissent and judge one another.  This gig is hard enough on its own.  We don’t need to make it harder on one another.  Mothers should band together and support one another, not take one another down.

  1. I am happiest when.

I am home with my kids.

  1. I am saddest when.

I have to leave them to go to work.  This is not a joke or an exaggeration.  Leaving my kids, especially the baby, actually makes me physically ill.  My stomach hurts all day when I’m away from them.

  1. My biggest fear.

I’m afraid of everything.  I walk around all day every day with a constant ball of anxiety in my gut.  I don’t know why but I wish it would go away.

  1. I am ashamed of.

I am kind of ashamed of how much I have to be ashamed of.  I had a very self-destructive period in my early twenties that ended the day I found out I was pregnant with my first child.  I’ve never looked back.  I wish I’d taken more advantage of all the assistance and opportunities offered to me.

  1. Something I need to forgive.

I need to forgive myself for being human.  I’ve come a long way and strive every day to be a better person and a better mother.  A wise woman once told me that the most important thing for our children to see is that we are striving.  Striving to be better, to do better, doing the best we can do. 

  1. Something I wish I could say to someone.

“I love you.”  I can tell my husband and my children, but anyone else, and I get all choked up and can’t get it out.  I express myself better on paper.

  1. Something I have never told anyone.     
  2. Something I am trying to change about myself.

Everything.  My goal is to be one of those amazingly centered, serene people.  I want to have a sense of calmness that radiates from my core and infuses everyone around me.  I’m a wannabe yogi.  I dream to have a daily practice where I get up at five every morning and do an hour of yoga before starting my day.  I’m nowhere this goal.  But it’s a goal.

  1. My biggest accomplishment.

My kids.  Absolutely the best thing I’ve ever done.  Not the giving birth, that part was easy.  But the raising of them.  Although I don’t really feel like I can take a lot of credit for them.  I think they just are totally awesome little people.  My biggest part and blessing is that I’m able to (try to) offer guidance and bear witness.

  1. I wish.

I didn’t have to work.  Or I could work from home.  Really, I wish for more time to do what I am called to do in my soul.  I want to be the one to raise my children.

  1. Something my relationship with my mother has taught me about parenting.

Boundaries are important.  Too rigid boundaries will foster rebellion.  Having no boundaries, however, will not provide the structure and security children and, later, young adults, need as they reach their way toward adulthood.  Don’t be afraid to piss someone off or create conflict if you feel a child is endangering herself.  Conflict can be resolved.  There is other damage that can’t be healed.

  1. Something my relationship with my father has taught me about parenting.

Parenting is an active job.  You can’t be passive and expect to have a great impact.  My father was a provider and a disciplinarian, but his job ended there.  It’s not enough.  My husband and I share an equal role in the providing for, daily chores, and discipline of our family.  It’s a much more equal, balanced home life, that is, in many ways, better than what I grew up with.  Also, my children aren’t terrified of their father.  Fear is not a great motivator.

  1. How I would describe my faith life.

Very personal.  I don’t believe in organized religion.  I believe spirituality is a deeply personal, individual thing.  I’m always happy to discuss my beliefs in an open setting, free from judgment and closed-minded-ness.  I like to describe myself as a transcendentalist/buddhist/pagan.  One of the great things that my parents did for me was to leave me free to choose my own path.  I was never told what to believe.  I fully intend to do the same for my children.

  1. Something I hope will be different for me by this time next year.

I hope to work less and have more time to be home with my children and husband.  I also want a dishwasher and a new vacuum cleaner. 

  1. Something important about my story that hasn’t been captured by the questions above.

I’m funny, fun and interesting.  I have some great friends, the greatest of which is my husband.  I have a sister who is eight years older than me.  She’s one of my favorite people even though I’m still mad at her for moving to Florida to marry a Navy Man nine years ago.  Also, I’m a great writer and would love to make some kind of career out of it.  From home.

  1. BONUS: A question you would like to see added to this list that readers can respond to in the comments.

Put in something fun, i.e.,  What are your hobbies? (I like to read and paint and ride my big green lawnmower);  How do you like to unwind? (read, write, play with my kids, drink margaritas, and in my mind I do yoga and exercise); Something creative you’ve done in the last six months (painted bugs and flowers on the walls in the baby’s room); favorite holiday (Halloween); favorite family holiday tradition (hors de oeuvre night on Christmas Eve); best book you’ve read lately (too many to name.  Love funny, trashy books,  Rarely get into deep, philosophical literature.  I read for escape and entertainment).

I’m a new blogger, (about two-and-a-half months).  Please visit me at The Real McFamily.  It’s good stuff.

 

20. I Just Want Them to be Better Than Me July 24, 2011

Filed under: Story — somemother @ 10:47 pm
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ESTABLISHING YOURSELF (a few details that help somemothers know what they have in common with you).

I am 29 years old.

I am married.

I have 6 children, 3 I birthed,1 that’s in heaven and 3 that I inherited. All girls 17,16,11,5,&2.

I stay home.

I am working class.

I live urban.

I own.

I completed high school and cosmetology school.

I am straight.

Of note about my ethnicity and/or cultural background: brown.

 

NOW, TWENTY QUESTIONS ABOUT YOU

  1. The most significant aspect of my upbringing.  I meet my dad when I was 7, and raised by my mother.
  2. My best advice to mothers about to enter the stage of child rearing that I just went through.  Get all the help you can get, never turn down help, sleep or over think being a mom.
  3. Something that concerns me about my children.  Will they learn to be strong responsible people. I just want them to be better than me.
  4. My absolute worst mothering moment (so far). Having ppd (post partum depression). It robs you of the fun you “should” be having, not rushing their independence .
  5. What annoys me most about other mothers.  Lack of discipline or the fear of being stern with children in needed situations.
  6. I am happiest when I’m watching a good movie and eating good food.
  7. I am saddest when I’m alone for too long. I feel neglected and abandoned.
  8. My biggest fear.  Being a complete failure, failure is ok if you have at least tried everything in your power.
  9. I am ashamed of my family, aunts, uncles, etc…
  10. Something I need to forgive.  I’m ok with forgiveness, it took some time but I have plenty to do than to think of all the wrongs that have happened to me.
  11. Something I wish I could say to someone.
  12. Something I have never told anyone.  I would need to write a book about this.
  13. Something I am trying to change about myself.  Live more in the moment, be less hard on myself.
  14. My biggest accomplishment.  Being a wife, mother, home owner and hood daughter. All things I didn’t think that I was worthy of.
  15. I wish.  I had a bit more money sometimes.
  16. Something my relationship with my mother has taught me about parenting.  You can’t be your kids’ friends while they need instruction. You’re raising your kids who will soon be adults.
  17. Something my relationship with my father has taught me about parenting.  Invest! Never withdrawal myself from my family.
  18. How I would describe my faith life.  Strong! I’ve had a pretty turbulent life, and it has built my character and although things have hurt, it taught me survival.
  19. Something I hope will be different for me by this time next year.  That I would be more of a “doer” and not a ” sayer or a wisher”.
  20. Something important about my story that hasn’t been captured by the questions above.
  21. BONUS: A question you would like to see added to this list that readers can respond to in the comments.
 

19. I Think I Did Alright July 21, 2011

Filed under: Story — somemother @ 11:55 pm
Tags: , , , , , ,

ESTABLISHING YOURSELF (a few details that help somemothers know what they have in common with you).

I am 32 (almost 33) years old.

I am not married but have been with my “better half” for almost 7 years.

I have 2 daughters ages 16 and 4.

I stay at home with my girls but I also go to school full-time.

My family would be considered upper-middle (I think).

I live in a suburb right outside a major city.

We own a home we had built about 4 years ago.

I completed high school and put off college (well I went on and off) but now I am back to it full-time.

I am straight (but sometime I think it might be easier if I had another woman to understand).

Of note about my ethnicity and/or cultural background:  I am white but my “better half” is African-American and my youngest daughter is bi-racial.

My URL.  http://whatnowmomoftwo.blogspot.com/

NOW, TWENTY QUESTIONS ABOUT YOU

  1. The most significant aspect of my upbringing.  I would have to say that I was the baby of the family and therefore spoiled rotten.  I had my parents together married happily for 16 years, and since the divorce (after the initial fighting) they have always been willing to get along for the kids.
  2. My best advice to mothers about to enter the stage of child rearing that I just went through.  The best advice I can give to any mothers is as hard as it seems, enjoy every moment good or bad because the moments go by way too quickly. (I know, my daughter just started driving.)
  3. Something that concerns me about my children.  The only thing that concerns me is that my oldest daughter tends to be shy, and withdrawn.  I would like to see her become more outgoing and confident in herself.  I want her to achieve every dream she has and let nothing hold her back.  My concerns for my youngest tend to be less dramatic, I would like for her to calm down slightly so that her attention span has the ability to catch up with her intelligence.
  4. My absolute worst mothering moment (so far).  Oh gosh there are soooooo many!!!  But to pick one it would be I lose my temper (which happens way to often) and yell/scream at my kids.
  5. What annoys me most about other mothers.  When  a mother thinks their way of parenting is the only right way.  Or when another mother of a high schooler thinks less of my daughter because I chose to have her at a young age.
  6. I am happiest when  I am spending time with my girls and they are happy.  Or when by myself on a beach having a drink and reading a good book (this doesn’t happen nearly enough).
  7. I am saddest when my girls are sad! or when the skies have been gray for a long time (think winter in Michigan)…I NEED sunshine.
  8. My biggest fear. Height…I firmly believe there is no reason to ride a rollercoaster.  I have no idea why people enjoy being dropped 30 stories and then going upside down!!!
  9. I am ashamed of. There are times that I am deeply ashamed that I had a child at 16…something I have to work on every time someone new finds out.
  10. Something I need to forgive.  I am a grudge holder…I regret this and really am trying to change this.
  11. Something I wish I could say to someone.  I wish I could tell me more what I think and not just hold it in (I know this doesn’t sound like me) but I bite my tongue A LOT.
  12. Something I have never told anyone.  I have never told anyone that I up until I met my “better half” I had hoped that my oldest daughter’s father and I would get back together. (I have no idea why this would be such a bad thing.)
  13. Something I am trying to change about myself.  I would like to become more dedicated and have more willpower.  These are 2 things I work on daily.
  14. My biggest accomplishment.  Being a single mom (for 10 years) and doing it well.  We always had a home, food, and clothing so I think I did alright.
  15. I wish. I would win the lotto (don’t we all).  No really I just wish that I am able to raise happy, healthy girls who become anything their heart desires.  (I hope I like their chosen profession LOL)
  16. Something my relationship with my mother has taught me about parenting. Patience is a must….I definitely need to work on this.  My mom has the patience of an angel (it really bugs me sometimes..).
  17. Something my relationship with my father has taught me about parenting.  Always stand behind your kids no matter what the situation.  My dad has always been there.
  18. How I would describe my faith life.  I’m not a religious person…but I do believe there is a “higher power” just not sure what/who it is.
  19. Something I hope will be different for me by this time next year.  Oh please let me stick to a diet and exercise program…
  20. Something important about my story that hasn’t been captured by the questions above.  I really am a boring and mundane person….the most excitement my life has right now is anything coming out of my 4 year olds mouth (you never know what she will say)
  21. BONUS: A question you would like to see added to this list that readers can respond to in the comments.  If you could go back and teach your parents one thing about parenting what would it be?