Thank you, God, for cancer and heart attacks. For broken relationships. For exasperating children and inadequate sleep and weight gain. For disappointment, debt, and my big and little sufferings. Thanks always.
41. Being Selfish October 10, 2011
ESTABLISHING YOURSELF (a few details that help somemothers know what they have in common with you).
I am 37 years old.
I am married.
I have 4 children. Here are their ages/genders: Two girls, 2 and 9, and two boys, 5 and 7.
I stay home.
I am middle class.
I live suburban.
I completed undergrad.
I am straight.
Of note about my ethnicity and/or cultural background: my dad is Jewish & my mom is catholic.
NOW, TWENTY QUESTIONS ABOUT YOU
- The most significant aspect of my upbringing. I had a happy childhood as the oldest of four children and we are all still very close.
- My best advice to mothers about to enter the stage of child rearing that I just went through. Try to see the humor in everything. Things that are frustrating now will make funny stories one day. And they will learn to sleep, eventually, I promise.
- Something that concerns me about my children. I worry too much about who their friends are and about them hanging out with the “wrong crowd.”
- My absolute worst mothering moment (so far). I was on an important phone call and my kids were screaming and carrying on in the background, making it hard to hear. I hung up the phone and turned to them and screamed at them. I mean, literally screamed. I completely lost it. They looked at me like I was a monster about to hurt them. I stopped my tirade and then very faintly, from the phone in my hand, I heard, “um, Hello…?” There was someone on the line the whole time, and they heard everything!
- What annoys me most about other mothers. When their children misbehave in public and they don’t try to stop it.
- I am happiest when. I’m with my family (and everyone is getting along).
- I am saddest when. I read a sad book. I get absorbed into the books I read and if the book is sad, I tend to let the sadness overcome me for days.
- My biggest fear. Oh, I can’t say, because then it might happen.
- I am ashamed of. Being selfish. Sometimes I’m so worried about my own life that I forget to ask a friend or family member about something important that they’re going through.
- Something I need to forgive. I need to forgive myself for not going to the prom in high school with a nice (but nerdy) guy I knew, because I was worried about what people would say if they saw us together.
- Something I wish I could say to someone. “I’m not rude. I’m just shy and it’s hard for me to speak up.”
- Something I have never told anyone. Once I bought a bag of Halloween candy (Reese’s peanut butter cups) and I ate the whole thing. In two days. Okay, not just once.
- Something I am trying to change about myself. I am trying to learn to relax, to eat better, and take better care of my body.
- My biggest accomplishment. My children.
- I wish. I had more money and less debt. Or at least that I didn’t worry so much about money.
- Something my relationship with my mother has taught me about parenting. Relax, everything is going to be okay.
- Something my relationship with my father has taught me about parenting. Relax, everything is going to be okay (and Daddy will fix it).
- How I would describe my faith life. I’m a Christian and I attend a very conservative Anglican church.
- Something I hope will be different for me by this time next year. Well, the health thing I mentioned- I hope next year I’m able to comfortably run 3 miles without wishing for death. And I hope I can get through one day without thinking about junk food.
- Something important about my story that hasn’t been captured by the questions above.
- BONUS: A question you would like to see added to this list that readers can respond to in the comments